Interrogation.

PROONO is inspired by the legendary recipes born behind bars, but crafted in a licensed facility using premium ingredients. We honor the spirit of the original — the resourcefulness, the defiance, the refusal to settle — while making something you can legally buy and drink without risking solitary confinement.

Imagine biting into a sun-warmed orange while standing in a concrete room. That's The Classic. Our range covers everything from light and fruity (The Commissary) to dark and aggressive (Cell Block Red). Every bottle is unfiltered, unpasteurized, and unapologetically raw. It's not for everyone — and that's the point.

We use the same fundamental principles as the original recipes: fruit, sugar, yeast, and time. The difference? We use premium macerated citrus instead of stolen cafeteria oranges, organic cane sugar instead of ketchup packets, and controlled fermentation instead of a trash bag under a bunk. The soul is the same. The execution is elevated.

Our products range from 10% ABV (The Commissary) to 18% ABV (Solitary Reserve). These aren't session beers — they're statements. Drink responsibly, or as responsibly as one can drink something called 'prison wine.'

We ship to most states within the US where alcohol delivery is permitted. Unfortunately, we cannot ship to actual correctional facilities. That's kind of the whole joke. All packages are shipped discreetly in unmarked packaging — no one needs to know what's inside.

Absolutely. You must be 21 or older to purchase PROONO products. We verify age at checkout and upon delivery. We take this seriously — the last thing we need is more trouble with the authorities.

Due to the nature of our products (alcohol, regulations, the whole deal), we cannot accept returns on opened bottles. If your order arrives damaged or incorrect, contact us within 48 hours and we'll make it right. We're criminals, not savages.

We occasionally open our doors for tours and tastings — think of it as 'visiting hours.' Follow us on social media or sign up for the Commissary Account newsletter to be notified of upcoming events. Conjugal visits not available.

Yes. If you're a bar, restaurant, or retailer interested in carrying PROONO, get in touch via our contact email. We offer competitive wholesale pricing and point-of-sale materials that will make your establishment look appropriately dangerous.

PROONO is satire, homage, and a celebration of human ingenuity in the face of impossible circumstances. We don't glorify incarceration — we celebrate the creativity and defiance that thrives even in the harshest conditions. Every bottle is a toast to those who refused to let their circumstances define them.